


One Last Time

by kurasuchi



Category: Gintama
Genre: F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-16
Updated: 2013-10-16
Packaged: 2017-12-29 13:46:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,653
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1006154
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kurasuchi/pseuds/kurasuchi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff"><p>jinbei – is a kind of traditional clothing worn during summer which as usually worn as a form of nightwear or house wear.</p></blockquote>





	One Last Time

_Strong yet gentle._

Those words described the sandy-haired woman named Okita Mitsuba, a young girl in her teens who, by some weird twist of fate, had been living her life upside down. However, she wasn’t scared—she wasn’t even unfazed by everything. Even though she had no more living relatives except for her beloved brother whom she had raised, even though she had recently been diagnosed with a fatal sickness, even though she got rejected by the man she loved, even though everyone she loved will leave her all alone—she still stood strong.

She was strong-willed. Everyone who had met her knew that fact. But strong or not, she was still human. And in those rare moments where she felt vulnerable, she did not stop herself from shedding a tear or two to express her grief, her sadness because by all means, she believed that those who are truly strong cries when circumstances demand them to do so. Although right now, would she even be considered as strong-willed?

Tears flowing down her cheeks, her hair disheveled, garbed only in her jinbei which hardly shielded her from the nighttime cold—her appearance was strikingly different from her usual one, and even though she looked like a mess, she did not care. She continued on running, the sound of her geta clanging against the ground, the only sound that filled her ears.

..And only sadness filled her heart.

She had known for quite some time now about their departure. She had accepted it a long time ago. She gave them the freedom to do whatever they wanted, but still… they didn’t have to do this to her.

They didn’t have to hide from her about the fact that… they are leaving tomorrow.

Sougo, her brother, had told her some time ago about Kondou Isao’s plan to depart to Edo. Honestly, she wasn’t surprised. She had expected Kondou-san to do that from the very beginning, and she knew that sooner or later, Sougo would leave her and follow the older man. Hijikata Toushirou too, the so-called ‘kouhai’ of her brother, was sure to follow Kondou-san. And even though she’d finally mustered up the courage to tell Toushirou-san her desire to be with him, sadly, she was rejected. From that moment, as soon as she was faced with the truth that she will be left all alone in Bushu with all of her loved ones leaving her, she had been bracing herself for that dreaded day, as she knew that it will come sooner or later.

But she never expected it to be that soon.

**XOXOXOX**

It was late that afternoon when her beloved brother went home from Kondou-san’s dojo. Even though he was still muttering curses directed to Toushirou-san as usual, she did not fail to notice Sou-chan’s weird behavior. He acted as if… he was trying to hide something from her. And later that evening, after eating their dinner, she noticed that the young boy was busy fiddling with his things—as if he was packing up for some sort of journey.

Hesitation filling her senses, she stuttered a faint, “S-Sou-chan, what are you doing?”

She knew that Okita Sougo was helpless against her, and that he cannot bring himself to hide things any longer from the woman who served both as his sister and his mother. But when he finally spoke, she felt her heart break into pieces.

“Aneue, we’ll be departing to Edo tomorrow afternoon.”

The words left by her brother had stung so hard. She did not know how to react right at that moment. She did not even know if she should get angry at him for not telling her about it earlier, or if she should be crying since the thing which she did not ever wish to happen had finally come. She felt numb.

Tears attempted to well out of her eyes, but she held it back in, trying her best to act strong for the sake of her brother, while the said brother, on the other hand, was too much occupied on explaining to her his circumstances—that he cannot bring himself to tell her about this fact, as he did not want to see her cry, and that he had attempted to tell her about this a plenty of times before, but to no avail.

Instead, she had opted to give her only brother a crushing hug, pouring all of her love and affection for the young boy.

“Sou-chan, please.. Promise me that you’ll never hide things from me ever again.”

She gave him a bittersweet smile, a kind of smile that will probably break all the hearts of men at Bushu. And Sougo, who noticed his sister’s melancholic mood, could not help himself but cry.

“Don’t cry, Sou-chan,” she hushed her brother in an attempt not to make herself break down as well. She could not help it. Seeing Sou-chan’s crying face made her feel like crying as well. “Aneue is not angry with you. I just wish you could’ve told me about this sooner. Let’s spend the whole morning together tomorrow, okay?”

The young boy nodded in agreement, which made her break out a smile. And as she had nudged him to go to bed, she silently went to her room and wept, the reality of the situation still not sinking through her senses.

Sou-chan is leaving tomorrow, and so is Kondou-san. The two of them leaving also meant that Toushirou-san, the man she had fallen in love with, would leave tomorrow as well. The wound in her heart caused by his earlier rejection still stung, hard, so much that she cannot help but to close her eyes as she winced at the emotional pain.

“I don’t care. What happens to you is none of my concern,” he said to her. She can still remember those words as if it were yesterday, and it did hurt like hell, but still, she cannot help but to remember it. She told him that she wanted to be with him, to be by his side, always. He had told her that she had nothing to do with him. And now, he’s going to leave her… for good.

She was a teenager in love. And like all other girls her age, she wanted to be with the man she loved the most. And the fact that he’ll be leaving tomorrow, away from her sight and possibly for good brought all kinds of emotions that confused her so much… and before she knew it, she felt her body move by its own as she did not even bother on fixing her appearance, just as long as she could spend some more time with him as much as she can, and as soon as possible.

Without even giving a second thought, she immediately ran outside her room, outside her house, outside the streets as she did not even give a damn towards the bystanders who had been giving her questioning looks. All on her mind was the desire to be with Toushirou-san—and thus, she ran towards the room that he was staying at in order to see him.

**XOXOXOX**

She was trying her best to calm herself down as she had finally arrived right in front of Toushirou-san’s doorstep. She was still catching up her breath; she was breathing heavily, with her whole body shifting its weight towards her knees that brought itself down the ground.

She wiped her tears with her sleeve. She was trying to fix herself up when she realized that she had just barged into a young man’s house clad in nothing but her night clothes. And right at that moment, she found herself hesitating for a bit.

Why did she come here? Now that she’s here, what did she want to do? Did she just want to see his face? Did she just want to talk to him, to hear his grumpy voice, to see him scowl, to see him avert his gaze from her as he blushed in embarrassment? Did she come here just to see him put a heap of mayo atop his rice, while she did the same thing as well with her chili spices and tabasco sauce? Truth be told, she did not know what to do anymore.

Heck, she did not even know if she should even see him right now. She looked funny, and she did not want the man she loved to see her in such a state right now. And mind you, she wasn’t the type to be mulling over appearances. And she wasn’t the type to be doing this kind of thing either. So why the hell is she doing this kind of thing now? Because she wanted to be with the man she loved, even just for a night? Because she wanted to tell him her feelings once again?

Or better yet, did she even truly love him?

Confusion and hesitance filling her thoughts, she was then startled to see the fusuma slide open, only to come face-to-face with the only man on her mind.

His eyes were as big as saucers, and she mentally chuckled at the sight of him being so surprised by her presence.

“M-Mitsuba.. what are you—”

“Toushirou-san,” she spoke, looking at him so tenderly as if he might just vanish if she had let him out of her sight even just for a second. “Toushirou-san, I… I—”

Much to her surprise, Hijikata Toushirou had reached out his hand to her and helped her stand up. “Why did you come here in such a state? What happened to you?” Mtsuba noticed the worried tone in his voice, which made her all warm inside. Hijikata, on the other hand, just sighed.

“Come inside,” he finally said.

**XOXOXOX**

Upon coming inside his domicile, he had offered her a damp towel to clean herself with and a hot green tea to warm herself up. Staring at his blue eyes as she sat across him by the table, Hijikata could not help himself but to avert his gaze away from hers, just like what he always did.

“W-What did you come here for?” he asked as he tried to sound annoyed, his earlier stutter easily betraying him. “It’s already this late, and you’re even wearing such thin clothes.” He finally looked at her in the eyes. “This isn’t like you, Mitsuba.”

The sandy-haired woman kept her silence for a few seconds before finally saying, “I don’t know.”

Hijikata gawked at her as soon as she said those words. She had been acting weird, he’s sure of that, although he couldn’t understand why she’s like that now since she was still fine when he saw her earlier. “Did something happen?” he asked her again, waiting for her to spill the beans. And this time, she did not answer, which made him even more worried.

“Mitsuba, tell me what happened—”

“You’re going to Edo tomorrow, aren’t you?”

Hijikata was surprised at this. How come he didn’t notice this earlier? If something was to make her act like this, then of course it could only be that! But… why did she bring it up now?

“Yeah, it’s tomorrow. Tomorrow afternoon, to be exact. Didn’t Sougo tell you?”

“Sou-chan only told me about that just now,” she replied, which made Hijikata facepalm in response. Damn that Sougo, that brat surely did it this time… He just picked out the worst timing possible to tell Mitsuba about their departure! And to think that he expected her to know about it a long time ago..!

Mitsuba placed her empty teacup back on the table, still fixating her gaze on it. “Why.. didn’t you say anything?”

“I thought… that you already knew about it a long time ago. I’m sorry.”

She shook her head. “No, it’s alright. You don’t have to apologize. No one is at fault,” she replied, her sadness becoming more apparent in her voice. “You guys have already made your decision. I have no right to question that.”

“But Mitsuba—”

“Toushirou-san,” she cut him off, giving him a pleading look. “If it’s okay with you, can I stay the night here? I just want to… with Toushirou-san…”

Hijikata was speechless as he tried to decipher what her words had really meant. His mind suddenly formed lewd thoughts as soon as he heard that she wanted to spend the night with him, but he brushed the thought off since he’s sure that Mitsuba didn’t mean it that way. She probably just wanted to—

“I want to spend more time with you, Toushirou-san… even if it’s just for a night, it’s okay with me. I know that we might not see each other for a long time; we might not see each other again, even. That’s why—”

“Stay the night here. I don’t mind.”

Mitsuba’s face lit up at his words, which made Hijikata feel a little bit better, seeing that the woman in front of him had somehow lightened up her mood. She gave him a heartfelt smile and giggled, berating herself for acting so stupid at the fact that she did something out of character just because she heard of their departure. At that moment, she decided that from that time onwards, she wouldn’t cry anymore. She would remain the strong yet gentle woman that everyone knew.

Right. She can do this.

“Thank you, Toushirou-san,” she finally said, her smile never leaving her face. “This just makes me so much happy.”

He smiled. “You seem to be a lot better now. You’re handling this quite well.”

“I can’t mope around forever,” she replied back, smiling. “You guys chose this to create a future out of your own hands. The least I could do is to send you off with a smile.”

“I see. If that’s what you want then I won’t question it.”

“Yeah. Spending time with you like this makes me a lot happy already,” she trailed off as she took her teacup, stood up and brought it to the sink. “I… I’ve always wanted to be like this with you, Toushirou-san.”

Her words had stabbed him right at the heart and it stung so much, he’s sure of that. He felt guilty. She just wanted to be with him like this, spending time with him doing everyday things. And yet he rejected her. He had refused her the opportunity to be with him.

Feigning indifference, Hijikata grunted and followed her towards the sink. “Oi, you’re the guest here, so let me do the dishes. You should get some rest, Mitsuba.”

He reached out for the cup and accidentally touched Mitsuba’s hand in the process, which made her drop the cup on the sink. The now-broken teacup scattered on the surface, Mitsuba panicked and apologized quickly, her face still flushed from the man’s sudden contact.

“I… I’m really sorry, Toushirou-san. I was just intruding here, and yet I…”

“It’s okay,” he replied as he tried to calm her down. “Don’t worry. It’s okay.”

She turned her back from him and took a deep breath before facing him with a smile. “I’m really sorry, Toushirou-san. Don’t worry, I’ll replace that teacup with a new one.”

“You don’t have to, since I’ll leave tomorrow anyway.”

“I.. I see. Right, you’ll be leaving tomorrow…” she trailed off, her voice decreasing in volume with her every word. “I… I guess I don’t have to do—”

Before Mitsuba could even say anything else, she found herself in Hijikata’s strong arms, his hands encircled around her back, his face buried on the side of her neck. He held her tightly as if he had no intention of letting her go, and yet he also held gently as if she was a piece of fragile glass that will break easily if he held her too tight. She blushed a deep shade of red as soon as she realized that she was being hugged by Hijikata—something which she secretly wished for ever since then.

“T-Toushirou-san..?” she asked, stuttering. ”W-Why are you..?”

“Be honest with me, Mitsuba. You’re hurting, right?”

“Huh? Why are you saying that? I’m okay—”

“No, you’re obviously not. Don’t push yourself too hard. Didn’t you say that you wanted to spend time with me for one last time? I… for our last night, I don’t wanna see you pushing yourself like this. Be honest with yourself. Cry if you wanted to. Release all your sorrows in front of me. This is… this is the least I could do... for all the pain that I’ve inflicted upon you.”

The tears that threatened to fall down her cheeks earlier had finally fallen down as she cried silently in his arms. She did not know why she felt so vulnerable and submissive right now, but she just couldn’t help it. And didn’t she tell herself not to cry anymore?

She was being stupid. Yeah, that’s probably it. Or maybe it was Toushirou-san who should be blamed, since a simple nudging from him made her resolve crumble so easily. So much for not crying in front of him. Isn’t she crying her eyes out in front of him right now?

As she mentally cursed herself for her stupidity, she then felt Hijikata brush his hands up and down across her back in an attempt to make her feel calm, and she smiled at this, surprised at his rare display of affection. He wasn’t saying anything else—his actions spoke volumes already, and it was enough for her.

As expected of Toushirou-san, she mentally bemused.

However, as soon as she thought of that, Hijikata suddenly did something truly unexpected—he placed his hands atop her cheek, his fingers brushing the tears away from her eyes. And as soon as his eyes had settled its gaze upon hers, she found herself totally being taken in by the man called Hijikata Toushirou.

She found herself falling for him all over again.

And before she knew it, she felt a pair of chapped lips touch her soft, supple ones.

Mitsuba’s eyes widened at the sudden touch, her mind still being unable to process Hijikata’s unusual actions. Hugging her and caressing her cheek was surprising enough. And now… this..?

Did he really.. kiss her..?

The heat from his kiss still lingered upon her lips even when Hijikata pulled away, looking at her with eyes full of affection, boring its way onto hers, as if trying to convey his feelings for her—that he loved her back. But didn’t he just reject her a few days ago? So why is he—

“Please don’t ask why I’m doing this,” he suddenly said, snapping her back to reality. “I don’t know it myself either. And to think that I’ve held it back in all this time..”

Mitsuba was surprised at this, and she felt her throat run dry as she looked for the right words to say. But instead, she brought her two hands towards his face, cupped his cheeks and brought it closer to her own.

“So Toushirou-san…” she trailed off, sounding expecting. “You’re also..?”

Hijikata touched the hands that were caressing his face. “Don’t make me say anything further, please. Anything else and it will just make me break my already futile resolve.” He closed his eyes and leaned his forehead towards hers. “Mitsuba.. just for this one night, is it alright for me to be honest with myself?

Mitsuba smiled at this, her eyes brimming with unshed tears. “Of course, Toushirou-san. Of course. Just for tonight, Toushirou-san and I—”

She was unable to say anything else as she found herself kissing him once again—and this time, fiercely, as if he was desperate for her touch, for her kiss. She shook inwardly at the unusual feeling; a sudden pool of heat was forming on the pit of her stomach, and even though she wasn’t used to such feelings, she welcomed it wholeheartedly, trying her best to return the favor and ignite the same feelings to the man in front of her.

The first touch of their lips was awkward. Mitsuba knew that it was her first kiss and even though she wasn’t sure if it was the same for him, she concluded that first or not, it was obvious that he wasn’t used to this. They tried to find each other’s lips with their eyes closed, reveling on the nice feeling once their lips had met each other again. And as their bodies pressed against each other with renewed urgency, with him pinning her against the wall, his strong arms tightening its hold onto her wrists, her skin becoming more flushed by the second, her breath becoming more short and ragged—everything else became a blur, as the only thing that registered on her mind was the fact that she was in Toushirou-san’s arms, being close to him more than she had ever wished for.

Her hands had made its way onto his broad back, caressing it up and down, confirming just how well-built he was, his strong arms holding her in place as if telling her that she belonged there right in his arms alone. She kissed him harder and deeper than she could ever imagine. And before she knew it, she felt his tongue brush upon her lips, desperately begging for entrance. Startled at this, she broke away from the kiss in haste, staring at him wide-eyed.

And right at that moment, realization dawned upon her—she was making out with Toushirou-san. He kissed her fervently with the same intensity as hers, and even though she was happy at the sudden turn of events, she was wary of this as well.

This was all going too fast. Anything else would only complicate things further.

Feeling the pressure coming from Hijikata’s piercing gaze, she looked away from him, trying her best not to look at him in the eyes. “Toushirou-san, no more please,” she spoke, hesitation apparent in her voice. “This is wrong. No matter how much I wanted to spend time with you, this is all wrong. I don’t wanna force you into doing this, especially not now since you’re going to leave—”

“Mitsuba. “

She finally looked at him, her red orbs meeting his azure ones.

“I wasn’t forced or anything. And I’m not doing this because you asked me to. I… I am doing this because I wanted to. I wanted to be with you, even just for tonight.”

“Toushirou-san..”

He dipped his head closer to hers once again, his hands cupping her right cheek as he leaned on her forehead and placed a short, chaste kiss upon her lips. “I want to have all of you, Mitsuba. Are you… willing to have me as well..?”

Tears fell down from her eyes as she tightened her hold against his clothes and brought him closer to her, kissing him fully. “Do whatever you want to me. I… I love you, Toushirou-san.”

And without wasting another second, the two teenagers kissed each other fervently with all the passion and heat that they could ever muster. Hijikata’s tongue had made its way onto her mouth once again, and this time, Mitsuba welcomed it with a brush of her own tongue, trying her best to imitate the raven-haired man’s actions.

She found his hands atop her shoulders, massaging it and caressing it gently as if tickling her. He slowly loosened the knot on her jinbei, and before she knew it, he was already kissing her neck, which made her tilt her head to her right. Tugging her clothes down slightly, he exposed her creamy shoulders and proceeded to shower it with light kisses, which made her gasp for breath. The cold night air mixed with the feeling of his warm mouth against her skin was too much for her to take that she could not help but to move her hands atop his chest, snaking its way under his clothes in order to feel his skin.

Just as when she had fumbled her way around his clothes in order to expose his chest, she was startled when she suddenly felt his fingers brush against her firm, taut nipples through her clothing. She then remembered that she wasn’t wearing anything underneath except for her panties, and that fact only made the feeling more… intense, as if electrifying her.

“T-Toushirou-san…”

He did not speak a word as he silenced her with another deep kiss. And as their tongues fought in intense desire to dominate over the other, he tugged at her jinbei once again, finally exposing her lush, full breasts. He cupped her left breast with his hands, savoring the feeling of her hard nipples against his calloused skin. Her breasts were just the perfect size for him—it felt perfect under his hands, kneading it up and down skillfully as he pinched her nipples in between his fingers and rolled the sweet buds with his every movement. And as he heard her moan and whimper slightly at his ministrations, he cannot help but to let out a smirk on his lips, keeping in mind that it was him who was making her act like this.

The kept on kissing each other like ravaging beasts hungry for the taste of each other’s mouth as their mouths and tongues had never left each other except for the times where they needed to part in order to breathe some air. However, that was pointless since they kissed each other again within a second, not even caring if their lips were all too red and swollen from too much kissing, if his tongue hurt when she accidentally bit on it when his tongue brushed against her teeth, or even when a mix of their saliva trailed off their mouths. All that mattered was the sudden urgency to bring them closer than ever before, and their desire for one another only increased as they found themselves becoming hotter by the second.

Driven by the desire to feel more of each other, Mitsuba moved her hands everywhere in order to feel more of his warm chest. She caressed her fingers against his stomach, memorizing every contour of his body, tracing every curve of his abs. She then stopped on her ministrations as soon as she felt his other hand move its way towards her thigh, which made her crave for more. He brushed his fingers all the way to her panties, and she realized that she was already dripping wet for him, her own juices soaking through the thin fabric of her panties. Wanting for more, she could not help herself but to grind her hips onto his hands in a desperate attempt for more of his touch. Smirking against her mouth since they still haven’t released their hold upon each other’s mouths, he pulled down her panties and rolled up the lower half of her clothing, revealing the lower half of her body which she had never let anyone see before.

Their tongues still entangled upon each other, Hijikata pushed her back further against the wall, which made her arch her back in order to meet his fingers that were now caressing her womanhood. She became more and more intoxicated at the foreign feeling on her genitals, which made her let out a loud gasp when he had suddenly stroked his finger on her clit.

Lust, love, passion and desire clouding her senses, she did not think of anything else anymore as she focused on one thing: closing the gap between them, making the two of them as close as possible.

“M-More… I want… more… Toushirou-san…”

And Hijikata did not fail as he had finally freed himself from her mouth, only to find himself sucking on her breasts, stimulating her already-hard nipples with every flicker of his tongue. She then moved her body in order to meet him—she arched her back even more in order to give him more access to both her breasts and her womanhood, while she gripped on his long hair as tight as she can. He did not fail her as he even intensified his ministrations on her breasts, sucking on the two mounds of flesh without hesitation, nipping on the pink skin of her protruding buds. Her pleasure was even more intensified when he continued on stroking her clit, sending her to the edge.

But she wanted more of him. She wanted to be closer to him. She wanted to close the distance between them. She wanted… him.

And thus, without even wasting another second, she brought his lips back to her own and fumbled her way underneath his kimono, until she found his fully-erected cock upon her hands. Noticing this, Hijikata let out a groan and grabbed both of her hands, pinning it against the wall. He then pushed himself even more towards her and grinded his still-clothed length against her fully-naked lower body, relishing on the feeling of his clothed member against naked ones.

But it was then when he started to feel the need for more. He wanted to touch her fully, skin-to-skin. Realizing this, he wasted no more time as he brought her hands towards his length, giving her the freedom to do as she pleased.

“Touch me,” he insisted, and kissed her intensely like he always did. She relented to his wishes as she touched his member through his clothes, before tugging down the annoying boxers until his length was now erect in front of her. She then proceeded to stroke his length up and down in succession, amused by the look of pleasure on his face and his seductive moans with her every caress on his length.

“T-T-Toushirou-san…!”

Excitement coursing out through her veins as the both of them intensified their ministrations on each other’s body, their desire to feel more of each other’s touch won in the end as Hijikata had finally brought his hands atop her own, and guided it in order to push his throbbing member inside her. And just as when his length was positioned at her entrance, he stopped on his tracks and looked her, as if asking for permission. Realizing this, Mitsuba gave a slight nod and smiled.

She called out his name as soon as he intruded her, gently pushing his cock deeper inside her. He was trying his hardest to be careful and gentle in order not to hurt her, but he suddenly withdrew when he heard her whimper in pain. He then looked at her gently and saw tears brimming down her eyes.

“M-Mitsuba… a-are you alright? Should I… should I just—”

“I’m fine, Toushirou-san,” she chastised him, and kissed him on the lips in order to prove her point.

Wanting to make it up to her, he pushed himself inside her more carefully this time, his length moving back and forth inside her. And as he was taken over by the increasing pleasure, he held her tightly and moved his hands atop her firm buttocks in order to support her weight, as he instructed her to straddle her legs against his hips for more ease in movement. And soon enough, she was starting to meet him halfway as her earlier pain turned into pleasure, her movements finally matching his own, their bodies moving in a steady rhythm.

And it was then when she heard him say her name plenty of times until she lost count, amidst all the moans and cries of pleasure.

Hearing him chant her name in pleasure was like music to her ears—no, it was more like a drug, as she felt herself becoming more and more intoxicated at the feeling, always wanting for more. And come to think of it, she came here in order to spend more time with him, to be with him as close as she could possibly be in the shortest time possible… but never did she expect something like this.

She didn’t regret it though. She could tell from his actions that both of them wanted this, so much that they will forget about everything else just for the sake of each other’s touch. And as soon as she found herself kissing him once again—with her tongue battling with his own, her breasts pushing against his chest, her nipples tickling against his skin, their sweat dripping against their bodies, his length deeply inserted against her opening, pushing it further and deeper that the only sounds that she could hear were the sounds of their bodies slapping and grinding against each other, their ragged breaths, their moans and whimpers and all other kinds of sounds, as well as their chants of each other’s name, which only sent them further to the edge—she confirmed on how just she loved him, that she was even willing to give herself and her own chastity to him, and to him alone. And even though she knew that he didn’t accept her feelings, even though she knew that he still hasn’t said anything, even though she knew that he would be leaving tomorrow, and will never see her again, most likely… it was alright for her.

For some strange reason, it was okay.

“M-Mitsu… ba… M-Mitsuba…!”

When she heard him say her name in such a way, she knew that she already found her answer.

He loved her. He loved her so much that he was willing to compromise his own happiness just for the sake of her own. He loved her, that’s why he was willing to reject her and hurt her, only for her to find someone else to love and live a normal life. She knew that he hated himself—he blamed himself for everything, after all.

All of her love for him swelled out of her chest as she locked gazes with him, staring deep into his eyes, their bodies still connected as it continued to push against each other. And as his thrusts became even faster and deeper than she could ever imagine, she knew that she was close. Really close.

And because of that, she smiled at him and told him exactly what is on her mind right now.

“Toushirou-san… please… don’t ever forget my feelings for you. Even though we might be apart, I will… always love you, Toushirou….san…”

Stifling out a loud moan from coming out of her lips by kissing Hijikata as deep as she could, her own body came at its climax as she felt her whole body spasm in response, her own juices covering his rod that was still inserted inside her. Everything blanked out for a few seconds, her muscles contracting as she felt her another wave of orgasm wash upon her, and this time, he also came a few moments later, his length never leaving her secret spot.

Panting and trying desperately to catch their breath, they leaned their forehead against each other and settled for a quick peck on the lips, before she slowly lost sight of her surroundings and lost consciousness.

**XOXOXOX**

Mitsuba woke up the next morning feeling too sore all over, her body aching in all kinds of places. Realizing that the sun had already risen and that she had a promise to Sou-chan that she still had to fulfill, she slowly sat up and winced, the sharp pain on her body making her feel more tired. Glancing at her surroundings, realization dawned upon her as she remembered what happened last night.

She heard from Sou-chan that they were leaving that afternoon and hence, she went to Toushirou-san’s house, asking him to let her stay the night. She wasn’t sure how and why it happened, but they somehow had sex near the sink for the first time. They later went to his futon for another few rounds, and that’s why she’s in his futon right now, fully naked with only his blanket serving as her covering. Standing up in haste—bringing his blanket along with her in order to cover her naked body—she looked around the house, only to find him nowhere. His cupboard was void of his things as well, and she realized that he’d already packed his things and left.

Despite everything that happened last night, his decision was still firm and strong.

She smiled to herself.

She wouldn’t take it against him—or rather, she could not. It was one of the reasons why she fell for him, after all.

Taking a deep breath in order to bring her back to her senses, she quickly dressed up and fixed herself before going home. She was lucky since Sou-chan was still asleep when she arrived at their house, and thus she wouldn’t have to explain herself on why she just came home at such an hour.

And throughout the morning, she had just spent time outside with her beloved brother, playing and eating all of their favorite food, doing all kinds of things which both of them considered their favorites. It was a fun morning—yet all good things must come to an end.

Afternoon came shortly thereafter, which also meant that she had to bid them farewell. After saying goodbyes with everyone, she saw them off as they started to walk down the road of their own choice—the road to becoming a true samurai just like what they always wanted. She will just giggle whenever Sou-chan tells her of Kondou-san’s dreams once they reach Edo—that they will form a group of samurai that will protect the country by their own means, that they will make a name for themselves, that they will serve the citizens to the best of their ability, and that they will live by their own bushido, the fire in their soul never losing its color. But even so, she believed that they will be able to achieve it… since if there’s someone who could do it, it could only be them.

Looking at them from afar made their backs seem to be broader and stronger, she mused to herself. Even Sou-chan, who was still clearly a child right at that moment, seemed to be more mature right now as he walked in between Kondou-san and Toushirou-san. There really was no room for her among them, she realized, since they looked the happiest when the three of them were together. And now that they are going to live their lives according to their own bushido, she had no other choice but to support them.

Indeed, she would be lying if she said she wasn’t lonely. She was lonely. She was sad. It is only natural, since everyone she loved will be leaving her all alone. Sou-chan had left her. Toushirou-san had left her. Kondou-san had left her. Everyone else in the dojo had left her. She was alone. However, this does not mean that she wasn’t happy for them. Right at that moment, she felt true happiness as she realized that the people she loved will be truly happy—since seeing the ones she loved happy made her happy as well. And that’s all that matters to her. She was satisfied with that. And since she had made her resolve, she will see through it till the end and support them all the way.

She bid them goodbye with a smile, and so did they. Just knowing that they are about to embark on a new journey by themselves with smiles on their faces is enough for her.

She then closed her eyes, her smile never leaving her face as tears started to threaten her eyes.

> _You left me behind. So you mustn’t waver. You must hold fast to your convictions._
> 
> _Don’t look back. You’ve made your decision back then by yourselves._
> 
> _It’s the path you chose, isn’t it? In that case, don’t cry. I liked seeing you moving forward without hesitation._
> 
> _You were all brash, shameless and awkward, yet you were also kind. I loved it._
> 
> _That’s why I’m truly happy… that I was able to meet wonderful people like you._

**Author's Note:**

> jinbei – is a kind of traditional clothing worn during summer which as usually worn as a form of nightwear or house wear.


End file.
